The Merry Old Land of Oz
by imapinkdinosaur
Summary: After Neverland, everyone returns to the Enchanted Forest. There Captain Hook decides to go his own way. While on his way to the dock, he meets some old friends, Tin Man, Scarecrow, Cowardly Lion, and Dorothy of Oz. But one day, Glinda takes Dorothy captive to be held prisoner by the Wizard. So the men decide to travel to Oz to save her.


It was a cold, crisp day in Storybrooke. It was great weather for a ball, which was precisely what was happening. The Charmings decided to throw a royal ball in order to show off Snow's baby bump. Hook watched in the outskirts of the ballroom as Emma danced with Neal. The moonlight made her blonde hair shine like gold, and her pink dress showed off her body. She looked happy being reunited with her family that Hook felt it was wrong to try to stop it. So he made his decision: he was going to leave here and find somewhere else to dwell. It was obvious he wasn't welcome here. So he took his leave to the docks to find a ship.

While on his way, he was stopped by bandit in a cloak with the hood drawn on his face. The bandit brandished his sword and said in a rolling Scottish accent, "Stop! Empty your pockets or else!" Hook stopped in his tracks, recognizing the bandit's voice. He noticed a small tattoo of a scarecrow decorating the top of his wrist on the left hand.

"And if I refuse?" Hook asked, suspicious of the man.

As he ended his sentence another bandit jumped into view. "We'll kill you." Said the new bandit, dressed similar to his counter part, yet distinguishable by his Welsh accent. He too had a wrist tattoo, but one of a tin man.

"I don't think I believe you." Hook asked, attempting to stall the bandits.

As if by magic the third bandit appeared, wearing a similar ensemble to the others. He proclaimed in a South African accent, "Trust me when I say, we would not hesitate to kill you."

As the bandit discussed his intentions, Hook noticed a small tattoo of a lion on the wrist of the third bandit. The familiarity washed over him and he smiled smugly, "Ah. Of course. Scarecrow, Tin Man, and the Cowardly Lion. So nice to see you once again. Parading through the forest for scrapes, I see."

All three men removed their hoods to reveal their faces and clothing.

The man with the scarecrow tattoo had floppy messy blonde hair, and bangs that constantly covered his yellow eyes. He had a tall and lanky body that came in handy when using his acrobatic skills. He wore a short-sleeved red tunic, brown pants, and brown boots.

The man with tin man tattoo seemed to be greying, but the hairs shined like silver amongst his light blonde hair, and seemed to glow in the moonlight. His blue eyes were a pale blue, and in some lights, seemed to be white. His skin seemed to made up of moonlight by how pale he was. As if to exaggerate his pale skin, he wore silver boots that met with his knees and paired them with light gray pants and a silver tunic. His tunic hid his long torso, but hugged his broad shoulders, and allowing someone seeing him for the first time to concentrate on his long thin legs.

The third man with the lion tattoo had a mess of curly brown hair frizzed into mane and swept the top of his shoulders. His eyes were a brilliant green and were accentuated by his tanned skin. A golden tunic covered his thick torso and dark brown pants and dark brown boots protected his muscular legs.

All three men had belts that held their long swords and black wristband on their right hands.

"How did you find us out?" Tin Man said.

"Your tattoos. For people who don't like to expose themselves, you don't do a very good job of covering them." Hook replied.

All three of them looked at their tattoos simultaneously and gave a laugh.

"I see you're missing a partner-in-crime. Where's Dorothy?" he asked.

"For someone who seeks treasure, you are really unobservant." a woman's voice with a Yorkshire accent proclaimed from behind Hook.

He turned around to see a familiar head of red hair. She had tied back her hair so as to frame her freckled face, and allowing her bangs to frame her face, which only strengthened her beauty. Her doe-like eyes were an earthy brown. She wore a gingham blue and white tunic with a square neckline which hugged her curves, creating the illusion of a corset being used, and her sleeves reached her elbows, allowing breathing room for the small tattoo of a Scottish terrier on the right hand and a dark green wristband on her left hand. She also wore tight black pants and knee high boots with an inch of heel. Her tight black pants were tucked into the boots.

"I wondered when I would see your faces again." Hook said, smirking.

"It's nice to see you again Killian. It has been a while," she said with a smile on her face. "The last time we saw you, you were off to seek fortune. I can't quite recall when it was exactly that we last saw you but I believe it was shortly after the discovery of fire, if my memory serves me well."

Hook shrugged, unmoved by Dorothy's sarcastic remark. The shrug caused his hook to shine moonlight into Dorothy's field of vision. Curious, she looked down at his hand and asked loudly, "What happened there?" Causing all those around to stare at the wonder that was Hook's hook.

Hook looked down at his hand, with the current reunion taking place he had almost forgotten about his slight handicap. "A crocodile took it." He answered coolly.

"A crocodile? Their diets don't usually consist of human meat. How did he manage to take it?" she asked, raising one eyebrow.

"The man who took my hand had the skin of a crocodile." Hook said impatiently.

"How were we to know you have taken up speaking in riddles? You should have simply stated that a man had taken your hand, sparing us from inquiring after crocodiles and their feeding habits. A man taking your hand makes more sense," Tin Man replied.

"What'd you do?" Scarecrow inquired.

"Why must I have done something? Humans can be cruel in nature, and this man doubly so. How do you know he did not take it to create joy for himself?" he asked.

"You know as well as I most humans are not cruel. Also, you are Captain Hook. There have been many times where I almost cut off your head, let alone your hand. I sincerely doubt that you were the innocent party in that matter. No one gets a punishment they do not deserve." Cowardly Lion said wistfully.

"This is one of the rare occasions in which I was an innocent. I did nothing to the man. He only took my hand because I had fallen in love with his wife," Hook stated.

"Ah, there it is. There is the reason behind the action." Tin Man said.

Dorothy had remained quiet during the entire dialogue. Her eyes were fixated on the hook that still continued to shine moonlight onto her face. Suddenly, as if possessed by some thought, she grabbed his wrist and pulled off his Hook.

"What on Earth do you think you are doing?" Hook asked, surprised by this random action.

"No talking," she answered.

She took the stub and held it underneath her right hand; as if there was an invisible hand she was planning on shaking. Suddenly, a hand began to grow from the stub, emerging from the long-healed skin. After a few moments, the hand was fully formed and Dorothy freed it from her grasp. Hook examined his new-formed hand with wonder in his eyes. "How did you manage to do this?"

"Really? Magic, of course. How else?" was her smart-ass answer.

Hook glared at her asinine reply. "Oh, I am so sorry. Magic? Really?" he asked sarcastically, "I could never have guessed."

"Yes, magic," she replied in an exasperated tone.

"Now, where did you acquire such a gift? The last time we saw each other the only magic you were barely able to perform required coins and a child's unwashed ear. And even then you still were unable to convince even the most naïve of children that you had some sort of power."

"I learned it."

"Really? You learned it?" he asked sarcastically, "I had no idea that was possible."

"Yes, I learned it. It is possible to learn a new skill but seeing as you could never leave that self-centered world of yours, you can't possibly see that. However, this is besides the original point of conversation. What are you doing now?" she questioned hurriedly.

"I am journeying to the docks in search of a crew to sail with me," was the reply provided by Hook.

"May we come along? There is not much to do here, as there is no need for spies in this land. We long for adventure." Tin Man asked excitedly.

"Can you man a ship?" Hook asked.

"Can we man a ship? He's asking if we can man a ship," Scarecrow said. "And how long has he known us exactly?"

"I am not sure Hook, can YOU man a ship?" Cowardly Lion scoffed.

"It is as if he has forgotten how we were introduced. Everything he knows of piracy comes from our dear friend Dorothy. Am I not correct?" Tin Man asked.

"Yes, Tin Man. You are indeed correct. When we first met him the closest thing he was to a pirate was to look upon the ocean from his window. Now that he is a big and important pirate, he has the audacity to question our nautical knowledge." Dorothy replied, shaking her head and tutting.

"Oh, alright. Stop with the commentary. Can you find me a crew then?" Hook asked.

"We can help you find a crew, but only for something in return." Dorothy said.

"You can come along and be part of the crew." Hook said.

"Excellent, let us search for the remainder of this promising crew." Dorothy said.

….

Six Months Later: Enchanted Forest…again…

"Dorothy, I have most pressing news. It seems our dear friend Killian has once again found himself to become intoxicated at the local tavern." Tin Man announced, making his way into the _Jolly Roger's _captain's quarters.

Dorothy looked up from the map that she had been hunched over and studying in deep thought. She sighed at Tin Man's news.

"Alright. Let's get Scarecrow and Lion and go retrieve him. It's not as if I was doing something important."

They met with the two men and went on their way towards the tavern to retrieve the drunken pirate.

When they arrived, they saw that Hook was seated at an empty tabled, with his head drooping and hand grasping tightly to an empty lager glass.

Dorothy rolled her eyes, much to the amusement of Tin Man, who noted this action from his peripheral vision.

"This is a growing nuisance. Why does he drink until he can no longer feel?" inquired Scarecrow.

"He can't accept that Emma won't love him back," Dorothy explained. "It's becoming quite annoying. Come, let us take him back to the ship."

The quartet walked up to the table in unison. Tin Man and Lion put his arms around their shoulders and lifted him from his seat.

"Hello, Tin Man and Lion! My, my. Your names are quite strange, you know. Are they your ACTUAL names?" Hook slurred.

"Let us take him back to the ship." Dorothy ordered. "Scarecrow, please go with them and make sure Hook does not attempt to get away. I do not think his body could take another drop of alcohol."

The three men nodded, and dragged their friend out the door. Dorothy, with a frown, turned around and faced the large barkeep. "How much does he owe you this time?"

Next day

Hook awoke the next morning with a headache that felt as if a million elephants were stepping on his head at once. He slowly sat up and rubbed his temple. With a loud groan he threw his feet over the bed and walked to the door leading outside. He opened the door carefully, as if he were scared of being attacked by an assailant. The door revealed a beautiful sunny day, much to the dismay of Hook's head. He attempted to block it out with his hands.

"Good morning Killian! Have you slept well? Is it not a gorgeous morning?" hollered the Tin Man.

Hook glared as best as he could, with his still splitting headache and hoarsely replied, "Shut up. Turn off the sun."

"Absolutely not good sir. Not only is your request most impossible, it is also part of the amazing consequences of having too much drink." Tin Man replied.

A crewman rushed towards them in a panic, "Tin Man! Sir! I have most distressing news!"

Hook let out a groan. Not only was the man loud, he had also caused his request for the shut down of the sun to go ignored.

"What is it, my good man? Tin Man asked hurriedly.

"Dorothy, sir. She's been taken!"

"What? How did this happen? Who took her?" Tin Man asked worriedly.

"I do not know, sir. It happened so quickly. There was a beautiful woman in a pink dress that came through a portal. She and Dorothy battled each other for a while, but Dorothy lost to the pink woman. The woman then grabbed her and took her through the portal. The strangest part of the entire business was Dorothy's face. She showed fear. I have never seen her scared before."

Tin Man began to take deep breaths, as if to calm down a panic that was rising within him, and his face turned a sickly pale color.

Hook looked at his face and asked, "What is it? Do you know the pink woman?"

"I must ask that you call for Scarecrow and Lion and have them meet us in the captain's quarters." Tin Man said over his shoulder to the crewman as he walked towards the room.

Hook, unrelenting in his curiosity, followed him, although his head still ached.

"Tin Man! Answer me! Who was the pink woman?"

"It was Glinda. She was a witch that ruled the southern portion of Oz. She came here to take Dorothy back to Oz."

"Pardon me for asking, but I though you were from Oz?"

"We are."

"I don't understand what the problem is."

Tin Man stopped in his tracks, and Hook followed suit. Tin Man looked Hook in the eyes and answered, "It is a crime to go against the Wizard. Scarecrow, Lion, and I, we fought against the Wizard and were imprisoned. Scarecrow was forced to be a lifeless scarecrow, forced to look over a field of corn; I was sentenced to become a rusty old tin man, forced in a frozen state. Lion was turned into a lion and unable to leave the forest he was made to live in. We were to never see each other again. Dorothy rescued us from our punishments and reunited us. We became wanted criminals, and left Oz to spare our lived. We vowed none of us would ever return to Oz, no matter what happened. But now Dorothy has been taken prisoner for the Wizard."

"Why would he keep her prisoner? With a power such as his, why not just kill her and be done with it?"

Before Tin Man could reply, Lion and Scarecrow ran into the cabin.

"What has happened, Tin Man?" Asked Scarecrow.

"Men, we must return to Oz. Glinda has taken Dorothy, and it is up to us to get her back." Tin Man said.

"How will be accomplish this? We do not have the skill required to create a tornado, nor do we have any magic beans with which to travel and no way to call the flying monkeys here," the Lion argued.

Without speaking, Tin Man procured a bag and placed it on the table. He then took out a pair of ruby slippers. After a moment of silence, Tin Man spoke, "Dorothy once told me that these were a gift from Elphiba. She told me that if you tap them together and think very hard of a place, you will be transported there. I believe that these shoes will take us back to Oz." He turned to Hook, "Will you be joining us?"

Hook nodded.

"Are we ready men?" Tin Man asked.

"Yes!" they replied.

"Good. Take a hold of me and think of Oz." He tapped the shoes together and closed his eyes.

All four men disappeared in a poof and landed on soft ground.

"Home Sweet Home." Said the Tin Man bitterly.

"Oz." Scarecrow and the Cowardly Lion said in unison.


End file.
